| |
I could not call You, " Father," apart from the cross. Let me be continually mindful of the power and the intensity of Your plan, the love that was, and is, behind it, the willingness and the horrid suffering and separation of Jesus, and the shame and depth of my own sin. Jesus took my sin, in all of its ugliness, and gave me the beauty of righteousness, His righteousness, perfection of purity – what an awesome exchange! O God, let me never forget. These are words that reflect one of the deepest desires of my heart. I do not want to forget. I don’t want to live with the abrasiveness of guilt or shame – and I don’t – but neither do I want to forget. That may seem to you, a harsh desire.
In the New Testament, Paul did not forget his sin. He was no longer bound by it, no longer oppressed by it, no longer in its prison of deceit and failure, but he did not forget. He fully knew the reason-defying grace that had been poured out by God in his life. He was captured, and immersed, in its awesomeness. So am I – although I would not claim to understand it as fully as Paul did, nor would I claim to be as transformed by it as Paul was. In remembering my sin, I remember the Christ who died to remove its ugliness. I remember the love of His Father – a love that so embraced His Son, and yet He was pleased to allow His Son to suffer the torments of man and hell, because, and simply because, He loved me too. I remember my sin, and I remember that there has never been a shred of goodness within me apart from what God Himself has imparted because of the selfless, atoning sacrifice of His Son. I remember my sin, but I know I am no longer clothed in the filthiness of its rags. My garments are spotless with the very righteousness of Christ. I can fail in my desire to live out that righteousness, but I am accepted by the Father of my Christ, and I know that as "He loves me too," He also draws me back each and every time to the warmth of His Father heart, His lap of encouragement, and His very presence.
I ask too that I would not forget because, although my Father-God loves me as if I am the only one He loves, I know that there are multitudes of others that share His love. And I know that you too will fail, and you have failed. You have known the ugliness of sin, and sometimes, like myself, you too struggle with its constant hammering. But as I remember my own sin, I cannot and I will not judge you in yours. I will grieve for you for the consequences of sin you have had to endure, but I will delight unabashedly with the grace God has given you that exchanged your own ugliness for His perfect purity. I will remember my sin, and I will know that even if you stumble today, your precious, precious Father, still calls you His own.
|
|
